Keep Your Dentures In Your Mouth

Going to church every Sunday was not something we discussed on Saturday night.  It was understood, no questions asked.  We were supposed to look our very best, wear our best clothes, and act like somebody!  We weren’t to chew gum at church, and we absolutely weren’t supposed to laugh, unless it was appropriate.

One of the gentlemen in our church felt the call to the ministry.  He was a sincere man, so Daddy let him have the pulpit one Sunday.  I was in the choir, which had a perfect vantage point when it came to being able to see everything that was going on in the congregation, and behind the pulpit.  My sister was sitting next to me…bad mistake! 

The preacher got his ‘preach’ on.  He was slapping his Bible against the podium, and walking from side to side across the stage.    All of sudden, we caught sight of something flying across in front of us.  It was his false teeth!  Evidently he had not used his Polygrip that morning.  He immediately covered his mouth and called on someone to pray.  “Dear Father…” the prayer began as he hit the deck to retrieve his teeth.

My sister and I got so tickled that the movement of our shaking shoulders was vibrating the pew.  There’s nothing worse than having to stifle giggles.  Our faces turned red, and tears began to stream down our faces.  We could not control the laughter.  Every time we would dare to glance each others way, it would start all over again. 

We weren’t successful at sinking our teeth into that sermon.  However, we did catch Hell, once Daddy got us home.

Explore posts in the same categories: church, humor, Memories, Story

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9 Comments on “Keep Your Dentures In Your Mouth”

  1. Betty Lynch Says:

    Oh Pam, I can so relate to how to behave in church. I think I would have been right there with you laughing myself into trouble when the dentures came a flying. Thank you for sharing.


  2. All I could think of when I read this was an elderly uncle that often visited when I was a young girl who had a glass eye…I remember one time he though he would entertain us by removing it…icky!!🙂

    Thanks for sharing this funny story!

    Claudia🙂

  3. Pop Art Diva Says:

    I hit the enter button accidentally and, boom” away went my comment! Sorry if you get two.

    I was just saying that this post should point out that taking care of your teeth is a good idea – then you might not have this kind of problem!


  4. Made me laugh just picturing it. What a funny story.


  5. What a funny story! How in the heck were you expected to keep a straight angelic face with teeth flying and a “preacher” on his hands and knees crawling after them?? What a hoot!

    Thanks so much for sharing your memories!

  6. feistysideoffifty Says:

    Oh, Pam, I always love your stories and this is one of the best! You always display such biting wit and, even though you couldn’t sink your teeth into the sermon, you definitely made me smile!

  7. Susan Says:

    I agree, the visual on this is enough to make you burst out laughing!


  8. I remember the impossibility of not laughing, particularly when we were instructed as children not to laugh. Life is a game to children — there is not start and stop. I can just see your flushed faces, hands on your mouths, and tears of giggles rolling down your cheeks. ….maybe more tears later. They didn’t know it was the best we could do!

  9. rosie Says:

    Pam I can see it! This is too funny. Wouldn’t have been something if one of you caught the teeth just like a foul ball at a baseball game?


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